Do you ever have those moments of absolute peace & bliss? Of empowerment and euphoria? And hope? Those moments when you feel the whole world is meant only for the palm of your hand? Happy adrenaline pumped endorphins rushing from your brain throughout your bloodstream....and I'm not talking about drugs or getting high. Just 100% natural bliss!
First I want to thank you all for your comments and encouragement on yesterday's wishcasting post. I'm slowly & carefully weighing the pros & cons of moving to a larger city (likely Toronto), with my hatchling this spring when she finishes grade 8. I'm thinking and processing and considering, I'm optimistic but keeping it real, brave and yet fearful. The only way I can avoid this move and remain in this one-horse, one mall town, is to be able to get a car on the road again. That way, I could access employment anywhere up to about an hour away from where we live. Although these are rough economic times in my vicinity, there is a small offering of jobs outside my city bus boundaries.
I'm quite psyched about a move to Toronto, and last night I stayed up late with a pot of chai tea and searched the internet for apartments in the safer, more desirable areas of Toronto. Wowza!! Such high rents! But then again, for my income level here, I'm paying too much rent. Being that Toronto has so much more job opportunities for me, it's all relative.
Today I have access to my friend's car....all day. I am ecstatic. I intend to make it a worthwhile day, following up every job lead, and dropping resumes everywhere.
Driving is such a thrill for me, such a rush to my self-esteem. I feel in control of my life and my circumstances....something that has been just out of my grasp for so long now.
I feel free, I feel hopeful, I feel productive....not trapped by my car-less circumstances in what is most definitely a car community. I always teach my daughter that life isn't about "things" or "the stuff". I raise her to not be materialistic. However, a car, in my opinion, in my life, is as necessary as food & shelter...and today I have that gift. Today I feel whole.
I'm outta here!
Wish me luck on finding a job that pays more than minimum wage, so that I can afford my own car. So that I'm not working just to keep my head above water, rent & bills paid and food on the table! I need to have something extra, to put away each week, to be able to afford my pathetic little dream that would change my life!!
Out to the Universe friends! Send it out to the Universe....please & thank-you!
peace
12 comments:
My car is in the shop today and I understand now how it feels to lack the transportation I need at a moments notice. I sincerely hope you get the car soon. I am so damn inspired by your zest and commitment to pound the pavement with your resume. I've been unemployed for 6 months and I need to get off my ass and try much harder to secure a job. Happy searching today. I know your job is waiting for you!
I always say, the excitement is in the pursuit. If you make a goal of saying "going to Hawaii," when you get there and reach the soil, that's not the goal. The goal is in the planning, purchasing the right swimsuit, flying over the ocean, racing around the rainforests in the drizzle and lying on the beach and then having memories forever. Goals aren't a destination, they're a process that lives on forever even after it's over. So, even once you're in Toronto, the process of living there and making friends and memories will be part of the process. Decades later your hatchling will say how much it changed her life to be able to experience something new and brave it with you. Goals aren't ending points--only jumping off branches. Go for it!
You post is beautiful because it put things into perspective for me. I have a car and I live in LA where, I wouldn't be able to do anything with out it. You put this blessing in plain sight and not something to take for granted. In fact, today I will get an oil change and show love to my car!
I truly hope you get one soon, both a car and a job! Good luck to you!
Hooray, BMama! Wishing big wishes for you today! May the Universe send you all the Good things you need--and extra Good things you didn't even know you wanted. Tee hee!
Much Love, Much Luck and Many Blissings~*
Molly
As someone who just got used to her husband being home and driving her around so when I had to go out and walk in that winter... well, I can really relate to the need to have wheels. What a difference that must make. The ironic part is when you're in Toronto, you don't need a car. It's why I never learned to drive, why bother? Until I left, LOL. Now I see why. But I am not allowed to drive anyway. OK, this is feeling like my bio. Anyway, whether you stay there and get a car and make more money or go to Toronto with or without a car, I hope you feel that sense of whole you are describing. It seems very reminiscent to me but also elusive. :) You have it inside, I just know it.
sending positive vibes your way!!!
you are full of action energy! i wish you lots more of this. making a decision can be so freeing! (and obtaining a car is not a pathetic dream.)
What a burst of beautiful energy you've sent through this post! I'll be sending positive vibes and intentions tonight for you, sweetie. May the gods listen to your dream!
Thank yuou for your super-lovely welcome words, loved it! :o)
Kisses from us.
So many possibilities!
Wishing that it woks out for you, in the way you wish, or even in unexpected ways.
Enjoy the high!
Good luck wishes sent your way!
this blog is AWESOME. i linked to you from my friend Brooke's space urbanearthmama.
i am so glad i did. you are so sassy....love it.
blessings.
mb
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